Mistakes we found only now.
; Almy.
Haha are you serious ?
Okay I'll try, thnks btw.
; Denyse.
Don't worry babe.
For your case, you won't get fat.
Yeah, hahaha.
I think Arsenal sweets would be cool !
; Andrew.
Thnks kor. You too.
; Alex.
Alot more ;)
Been on my mind lately.
; Cindy.
Don't worry I'll share with you.
I was reading back on my previous blogs.
It got me thinking alot about th past.
How I used to change blogs.
Because I could never stick to one.
Rant so much about everything.
Being over-sensitive on some issues.
Making silly remarks, typing in paragraphs.
Nd most of th time being an emo girl.
I remember in those secondary years.
I always felt that my parents don't even bother about me.
Other parents used to show so much concern
for their daughter's schooling.
I was rather disappointed, because mine don't ask much.
They don't know my class, my subjects.
My co-curriculum activities, not even my test or exams.
I seldom head straight home after school.
So much so that I wanted not to bother about studies.
Yet it did me no good.
In th final year for th Os, they never asked.
They didn't know I was in th midst of my examinations anw.
Th day I received my results, I wanted to share th news.
But she rejected my call.
When it comes to friends, I put them in priority before th rest.
I could go nd help a friend out.
Rather than being at home studying for an upcoming exam.
I could spend my night talking on th phone.
With one who needs a listening ear.
Even if I needed my sleep badly.
But sometimes when I needed a companion.
There won't be anyone.
Like as if not even a single one of them.
Would want to put aside some time for me.
So what if you're labelled my 'bestfriend' or 'girlfriend' or 'boyfriend'.
I don't see it, I don't feel it either.
I get very envious when I know of others.
Who have such close friendships that last.
Be it for academics or personal reasons, I was at a losing end.
Past 3 years of my birthdays were horrible.
When I was 14, I had Aranda booked to celebrate.
Friends turned up, but main thinking only to eat th bbq food.
Cut th cake with me, nd leave.
From then on, I thought to myself.
Maybe it's because th examinations are near ?
So it's difficult to celebrate.
When I was 15, I had no celebrations.
Some close friends even forgotten my birthday.
But I can't get over my day just like that right ?
So like I bought a slice of cake nd went home.
Cried yes, but that's about it.
Then just last year I had my birthday wishes.
But still no celebrations.
I messaged my close friends asking if they were still free.
Yet no reply.
It was not any sweet sixteen like others had.
But thnk you Shir, for coming down to my house in th morning
Just to pass me my present nd cake on my 16th birthday.
I love you girl. You mean so much to me.
& thnk you Cindy, for cabbing down, picking me up.
Spending my last few hours going out with me nd al.
Like how th word spells it, girlfriend.
On th other hand.
I've never forgotten to wish my friends on their birthdays.
I'd remember their presents too.
See how upsetting it is for me ?
There are those times I had swings or I feel so down.
I vent my anger easily, nd through my words, even on friends.
Nd I apologise for my unruly behaviour.
I make them worry so much, I let emotions get th better of me.
Isolating myself. Hiding away during breaks.
Going to th back of th classroom to have some time alone.
Tears.
But I've learnt to move on with life.
Minor things like those shouldn't pull me down so easily.
In life, not everything is pretty.
I've got many more obstacles to face, this is just th beginning.
As said from last Monday onwards.
I seriously made my mind up to change for th better.
I'm alr not using anymore vulgarities, be it blogging or verbally.
I'm trying to make more new friends.
I'm not going to attitude at people or whatsoever.
But being nice to everyone.
-
Somehow I wish my friends could make my life much more worthwhile.
I don't want friends who only come nd go when they have no one else to look for.
I don't want friends who only take me for granted.
I don't want friends who forget th old ones when they go to another instituition.
I want friends who support nd share ups nd downs.
Friends who know th true meaning of who they are in th first place.
Jaslyn, Geraldine nd Jayne.
Despite our school stuff nd al.
We must have dinner out together still okay ?
& Shir.
It's so difficult between us, I'm going mad.
I miss you.
To those who alr found their closest bestfriends.
Remember to treasure nd not hurt.
Takes time to understand more.
I'm still searching for mine.
Al over again.
-
If only I could have someone who could stand by me.
Catch me when I feel like crashing down.
Hold me when it feels like th world's falling apart.
Telling me :
"I'm always here with you at your side.
So you won't feel lonely anymore."
Haha are you serious ?
Okay I'll try, thnks btw.
; Denyse.
Don't worry babe.
For your case, you won't get fat.
Yeah, hahaha.
I think Arsenal sweets would be cool !
; Andrew.
Thnks kor. You too.
; Alex.
Alot more ;)
Been on my mind lately.
; Cindy.
Don't worry I'll share with you.
I was reading back on my previous blogs.
It got me thinking alot about th past.
How I used to change blogs.
Because I could never stick to one.
Rant so much about everything.
Being over-sensitive on some issues.
Making silly remarks, typing in paragraphs.
Nd most of th time being an emo girl.
I remember in those secondary years.
I always felt that my parents don't even bother about me.
Other parents used to show so much concern
for their daughter's schooling.
I was rather disappointed, because mine don't ask much.
They don't know my class, my subjects.
My co-curriculum activities, not even my test or exams.
I seldom head straight home after school.
So much so that I wanted not to bother about studies.
Yet it did me no good.
In th final year for th Os, they never asked.
They didn't know I was in th midst of my examinations anw.
Th day I received my results, I wanted to share th news.
But she rejected my call.
When it comes to friends, I put them in priority before th rest.
I could go nd help a friend out.
Rather than being at home studying for an upcoming exam.
I could spend my night talking on th phone.
With one who needs a listening ear.
Even if I needed my sleep badly.
But sometimes when I needed a companion.
There won't be anyone.
Like as if not even a single one of them.
Would want to put aside some time for me.
So what if you're labelled my 'bestfriend' or 'girlfriend' or 'boyfriend'.
I don't see it, I don't feel it either.
I get very envious when I know of others.
Who have such close friendships that last.
Be it for academics or personal reasons, I was at a losing end.
Past 3 years of my birthdays were horrible.
When I was 14, I had Aranda booked to celebrate.
Friends turned up, but main thinking only to eat th bbq food.
Cut th cake with me, nd leave.
From then on, I thought to myself.
Maybe it's because th examinations are near ?
So it's difficult to celebrate.
When I was 15, I had no celebrations.
Some close friends even forgotten my birthday.
But I can't get over my day just like that right ?
So like I bought a slice of cake nd went home.
Cried yes, but that's about it.
Then just last year I had my birthday wishes.
But still no celebrations.
I messaged my close friends asking if they were still free.
Yet no reply.
It was not any sweet sixteen like others had.
But thnk you Shir, for coming down to my house in th morning
Just to pass me my present nd cake on my 16th birthday.
I love you girl. You mean so much to me.
& thnk you Cindy, for cabbing down, picking me up.
Spending my last few hours going out with me nd al.
Like how th word spells it, girlfriend.
On th other hand.
I've never forgotten to wish my friends on their birthdays.
I'd remember their presents too.
See how upsetting it is for me ?
There are those times I had swings or I feel so down.
I vent my anger easily, nd through my words, even on friends.
Nd I apologise for my unruly behaviour.
I make them worry so much, I let emotions get th better of me.
Isolating myself. Hiding away during breaks.
Going to th back of th classroom to have some time alone.
Tears.
But I've learnt to move on with life.
Minor things like those shouldn't pull me down so easily.
In life, not everything is pretty.
I've got many more obstacles to face, this is just th beginning.
As said from last Monday onwards.
I seriously made my mind up to change for th better.
I'm alr not using anymore vulgarities, be it blogging or verbally.
I'm trying to make more new friends.
I'm not going to attitude at people or whatsoever.
But being nice to everyone.
-
Somehow I wish my friends could make my life much more worthwhile.
I don't want friends who only come nd go when they have no one else to look for.
I don't want friends who only take me for granted.
I don't want friends who forget th old ones when they go to another instituition.
I want friends who support nd share ups nd downs.
Friends who know th true meaning of who they are in th first place.
Jaslyn, Geraldine nd Jayne.
Despite our school stuff nd al.
We must have dinner out together still okay ?
& Shir.
It's so difficult between us, I'm going mad.
I miss you.
To those who alr found their closest bestfriends.
Remember to treasure nd not hurt.
Takes time to understand more.
I'm still searching for mine.
Al over again.
-
If only I could have someone who could stand by me.
Catch me when I feel like crashing down.
Hold me when it feels like th world's falling apart.
Telling me :
"I'm always here with you at your side.
So you won't feel lonely anymore."
<< Home